Robin McLean

The first in a series of Improvisational-Epistolary-Inter-Species Dialogues with Fabulously-Talented Guest Bloggers Claire Burdett, Susan Tacent, (cameo by Cliff Johns) -- concerning Unwanted Roadtrips, Car Sickness, Budding Friendship, Blind Prejudice, Blind Forgiveness, Back-Room Deals and Movie Stardom.

Pearl
You don't know me but I'm friends with Robin. Maddy and I are really excited about road trip next spring! We talked with Claire and she won't/can't commit to part of the ride. But she said that we could offer you a floor, and Robin a bed and a shower, and fresh produce, and maybe we can figure out some readings on the west coast. She's a dumbhead for not joining in on the trip, but then you know her! Come west and Maddy and I will show you the ropes out here.
Woody Burdett


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Dear Woody,
I'm glad you are glad I'm coming because I'm not so glad I'm coming. My mom knows I hate the car and throw up in it pretty often. I told my mom I might boycott the Sidewind thing. She understands political protest.
I'll keep you posted. But...what kind of treats do they have in California? My mom says that Claire could at least ride to Hood River to see Nancy F, and then ride Amtrak back. A tiny distance. Look at the map!
High Paws,
--PEARL.

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Pearl,
Mom got kind of excited thinking about that ride to Hood River and a train! Hmmm...
We have special bacon treats made at the local bakery. Maddy and I get them all the time. We're thinking you should forget to protesting bullshit and come for the cookies. And you've gotta get over that throwing up stuff. We did that too for awhile.
Woody

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Sooo... ah, huh? Did someone say bacon? I think someone said bacon!
Cliff

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Dear Pearl,
What's all the fuss about? Haven't you heard about hiding under the bed? There are ways to skulk off swift as the wind and by the time they find you they can't reach you. Politics, yes, but cars?? Not so yes, unless you mean sleeping on one when the hood's still warm. Then again, treats are treats. Often it's best to lead with one's stomach. There are bookstores here in Rhode Island. We'll tell the nice woman who buys our food to get on it.
Sincerely (well, somewhat sincerely),
Kisu and Whisper

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Hello Kisu and Whisper,
You have much cooler names than I do. You also look very cozy in that cat knot.
It there are bookstores in Rhode Island then we''ll get barf bags and come on over. What about a beach bonfire reading? Suzanne and Julie can come down and read and Kara can fly in from Paris to make a cats-make-friends-with-dog movie. We need to think of at title.
When is your mom come back to Emily Dickenson's house? Does your mom know that that lady is dead?
See you on the beach!
PEARL

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Hi Pearl,
We think your name is pretty cool too. And yeah, the hairy rocking chair we've commandeered is definitely the place to be. Beach bonfire reading sounds awesome and totally doable. The neighbors love it when we invite them to burn stuff. And they're a very literate bunch, so they probably won't mind the reading at all! Great idea.Working on title for movie. Anything to get Kara back on this side of the ocean. Mom says she knows Emily's dead. That doesn't seem to scare her as much as we'd thought it would. Humans. Go figure.
Hope you like sand in your paws!
xo,
Kisu and Whisper

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Dear Kisu and Whisper,
Here's my first stab at a movie title: "Kisu, Whisper and Pearl."
I'm open to other ideas.
Let me know.
PEARL

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Pearl
...do not get mixed up with cats...
Woody

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Dear Pearl,
We love this title!
Much better than Milo & Otis, and The Aristocats is already taken.
Nice job.
Kisu and Whisper

P.S. Kisu is thrilled to get first billing. For a mostly blind cat, this is a treat, though for a Siamese, an expected one. --Whisper

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Woody,
Every cat is different.
Every cat has his or her day.
Stereotypes are hurtful.
Besides, mostly, we sleep. Then there's a couple hours stretching and yawning. Never mind grooming. More hours. And they keep our claws pretty pared down here.
Of course, there's still our teeth.
Yours in hairballs,
Kisu and Whisper

cc: Pearl

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Pearl
Also, do not get mixed up with skunks. The stereotypes fit on this one.
Woody

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Dear Woody,
I don't want to get into "The Cat Question." You just need to Google the word, "Diplomacy." If things work out with these cats, maybe I can get you into a movie: "Pearl and Woody and the Cats."
Keep your chin up!
PEARL

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Dear Kisu and Whisper,
I don't want to get in "The Dog Question." But I think Woody has learned some stuff from this experience. He is not a "bad dog" in the traditional sense.He might be nicer if you invited him to do a cameo in the movie. Just an idea!
PEARL

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Dear Pearl,
We're cool with Woody. Any friend of yours kinda thing.
Do we have invite rights? 'Cause there's this fox comes around sometimes. He's kind of tough on the squirrel population, but has a real screen presence.
Kisu and Whisper


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Robin McLean also blogs at Mike's Maze.